This week my brain has been B U S Y and on topics across the emotional spectrum.
Doritos. Everyone was talking about it, one of my friends was really into them but quieter, smaller bags of Doritos for women? IS IT JUST ME OR DOES THAT SEEM COUNTERPRODUCTIVE TO WHAT WE’RE TRYING TO DO HERE, DORITOS? I will eat – loudly and proudly – the same bag of chips as all of the boys. True or not, intended or not. What were they even thinking?!
Andy Lassner. If you watch Ellen you know who I’m talking about. Average Andy is very possibly my favorite segment of the show; I legitimately cannot handle the hilarity of it. This week Ellen sent him and Dax Shepard to the Super Bowl AND she did an Average Andy segment where he went to the circus. I laugh cried through the entire thing. I always do and it just leaves me wondering! I have so many questions about his life. Like what’s he like in real life? Is that really how he interacts with the world around him? How did him and Ellen become friends and…can we be friends?! But mostly, how many days until Ellen sends him back to a haunted house?
Stormi Webster. See what happens when you put out vibes into the universe? You get a response. But now I just keep thinking about all of these Kardashian kids’ growing up and being teenagers and all I can envision is he high school in Clueless; North, Stormi, Reign, Saint, Chicago all just rollin’ with their homies. It’s like an E! Reality show in the works. Oh, wait.
Valentine’s day. It’s coming and I’m having a hard time (once again) getting completely on board but I did find something that helped this year: the most adorable (and affordable) valentines with a personalized touch. I plan to give ours to the boys’ teachers and send them out to friends and family, and I have to admit it really has helped me get in the Valentine’s day spirit. So much so, that I also ordered perfect cards for friends, too! But Valentine’s day is still uncool and too commercial for me to really get crazy, so my excitement will probably end there.
Donald Trump’s ‘hair’ is an illusion. Yeah, I know, of course it is but I didn’t know it was as much of an illusion as it actually is. Are we going to also find out he’s a low-budget Russian robot in the near future? The more he speaks, tweets and, let’s face it, lives it becomes more and more impossible to believe he’s an actual human with lived experiences or a heart. That hair though, yikes.
JT. Ok. Am I the only one who cannot get behind JT’s new album? I’m so sad about it but I should have known when he named it ‘Man of the Woods’. If there is any man I have never associated or wanted to associate with the woods, it’s Justin Timberlake. RIGHT? And like the whole vibe of the album is just underwhelming. And I just have to point this out, a good beat does not make TERRIBLE lyrics okay – especially when they’re in the tune of “I brag about you to anyone outside but I’m a man of the woods, it’s my pride.” Am I just old?! What the fuck does that even mean?
And on a very serious note:
The first amendment. Have you all heard about this? Personally, I think it’s a shame – to say the absolute least. In a statement from the chancellor of the university, he said “The student’s viewpoint — however hateful and intolerant it is — is also protected by the First Amendment. That is the law, even if we disagree. Hateful words and speech, while protected, still have human and real consequences.” I’m very confused, to put it lightly – disgusted, to put it more directly. Living in Nebraska as an Iowa Alum, I have ridiculously worried my kids would be brainwashed to be Huskers fans but I have never worried about the capabilities of the university itself, until now. Regardless of what happens with this asshat racist and the university, which has already drawn on too long, my kids will never attend University of Nebraska-Lincoln and run the risk of being denied their safety and comfort in the school’s effort to save face in the eyes of our Governor. Better schools across the country have taken disciplinary actions for much less and UNL should have followed suit this week. I have spent more time thinking about this this week than anything else, from fuming to being heartbroken for the students who must feel so unsupported by a school they expect to do right by them.
Actions speak louder than words, we all know that, and in this case inaction could be easily confused with complicity.