Marty’s Chatty Corner

I don’t even know where to begin but here are some good ones – funny and sweet – from 2019.

“Mom, will you hold my hand when we go to Disney World because I want to go but I might be scared.”

“I want to go bowling.”
“We’re going in two sleeps.”
“Well, I want to go bowling now – it’s not up to you, you trickster. You house breaker.”
“What does that even mean?”
“Well, you break houses.”

“I’m so glad for myself! I’m so glad for myself, Dad! I’m SO GLAD FOR MYSELF!”
“Why, buddy?”
“I filled it up! I filled it up; I’m so glad for myself!! I filled up my money thing!”
“You saved it up!”
“Yes, I filled it up for myself!!!” I mean, can you even?

“Imma shoot that scorpion in the ass.”

“We’ve got to remember backpacks today because Dad always forgets backpacks.”
“Well, Mom doesn’t.” I can’t find my phone or the keys 83% of the time but my kids think I remember everything and that’s all that matters. 

“Abbott, you know what you just telled?! A STORY!!!” Nothing is better than when they’re so kind and excited for each other.

Movie playing: Fire at will! Fire at will!
“Matty, why are they calling him Will??”

“Daddy! Abbott said there’s a ghost in his water cup!!” Bedtime is still a struggle.

“Oh, man, Mom. It’s gonna creep my life out.”

“Hail comes from dark storm clouds. They throw it down to people’s houses and break the tops!”

“Mom, did you know I actually know what math is?” Interesting because I still have NO idea.

“Are you okay?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you want to take your costume off or leave it on?”
“Yeah.”
“Do you want to take it off?”
“Does Matty have his costume on?”
“Yeah.”
“I want to keep my costume on.” The night we purchased their Halloween costumes, they insisted on sleeping in them. Bot’s Batman chest is a tad too big and full of hard muscles, so when I woke up randomly at little after 3am, I went to make sure he was okay sleeping in it. I crept in the room and he was lying silently in Matty’s bed, at his feet. He opened his eyes and we had this very quiet – very sweet – conversation. He still loves nobody more than he loves his big brother.

“I love you. And I love daddy – more.” Um, thanks?  “Hey, Mom! Did you know who calls me a dumbass?! Hazel. She said, “Matty, dumbass!” At least now I know Marty’s not the only three-year old in his class droppin’ it like it’s hot. “Last night Matty must have been dreaming about movies, he […]

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This is our first chatty corner of 2018 and it’s time for Bot to have a permanent spot. I mean, he still says ‘No!’ and makes simple demands more than anything else and runs his words together because ain’t nobody got time for proper diction or actual English but he’s still hilarious. “Go to bed […]

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Marty has started preschool and IT IS showing. He is verbal in ways I was hoping he wouldn’t be for at least a decade. But he’s also so hilarious and spunky that there are days he literally makes me laugh cry. He is a ball of light and emotion and love and I DON’T WANT […]

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Recently, Matheson has been a talking machine and, as predicted, he’s hilarious (he gets it from his mama) but he’s also clever and charming and weird. He will be three in about a month and a half and the thought of that is mind blowing (that’s a statement I’m prepared to make every year because I’m […]

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I feel like I said this same things months ago but, you guys, Matty is talking SO much and his imagination is going haywire. The other night while he was eating dinner he yelled, “Mama! The lions are coming! NO, LIONS! THAT’S MY MAMA! NO, LIONS – GO OUTSIDE. BITING IS NOT NICE! NO BITE!” First […]

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