Ok, so I was going back and forth on whether all of my rage and disappointment in society stemming from Brock “Dickhole” Turner’s rape case was worth writing about because I’m guessing everyone else has covered my thoughts. But then I read this really cute letter to the judge from his friend Leslie Rasmussen and I literally cannot NOT say something because I’m a woman and a mother and a fucking decent human being with a brain.

First of all, is it common practice to write inarticulate, 2nd-grade reading level, irrationally insensitive and barely case-related, campaign letters to court judges? I mean, this isn’t a popularity contest, it’s not a swim meet or a vote for homecoming king. It’s a court of law??? And last I knew our court system’s purpose was to serve justice (or it’s supposed to)? Your letters are (or again, should be) fucking pointless??? Also, HE WAS CAUGHT ASSAULTING AN UNCONSCIOUS GIRL BEHIND A DUMPSTER.


No one cares how hard you helped him prepare for his spelling tests, Dan Turner. No one cares how “unfit” he is for prison or how many ribeyes you’ve cut into pieces for him that he hasn’t eaten. No one gives a flying fuck about how many more purposes he can serve by visiting college campuses to teach alcohol awareness. I could fucking do that for God’s sake – you don’t need to rape someone to do that! I’m actually pretty sure your son never needs to step foot on another college campus again – he’s had his “20 minutes of action”. Oh, and you’re sad because he has to register as a sex offender and his life will never be the same? Um, yeah. BECAUSE HE IS A SEX OFFENDER. That’s what happens in life – you make your bed and you lie in it (usually…). And I’m going to respectfully (hahaha JK) guess that Brock Turner is in fact the opposite of someone “gifted in his ability to understand complicated subject matter” – just going out on a limb with that one. But seriously??

Now onto the cute letter that sparked me to write this post (posted below). From what I can gather of this letter Leslie Rasmussen, aka B. Turner’s #1 fangirl, is a 15 year old tween without any real knowledge of what rape is or how consent works. I would also go out on a limb and say that, even though she wrote about the effects of alcohol like she has first-hand experience, she’s hardly choked down a wine cooler. You don’t just get drunk and rape people. You don’t become so overcome with “emotions and feelings” that you can’t keep your dick in your pants or your fingers out of some girl’s vagina to the point of completely disregarding the law – unless you have those sorts of “emotions and feelings” inside you – an extremely skewed sense of entitlement doesn’t hurt either. *ahem*

Also, a rapist is a rapist is a rapist. No rapist will ever be considered a sort-of rapist – there’s no equation that takes your level of intoxication and your location and then figures what degree of rapist you are. College campus or not, drunk or not – if you rape someone, you are a rapist – you can’t cutesy that up. Frankly, I have no fucking idea how you can even say “rape on campuses isn’t always because people are rapists”. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN MEAN? There was a man who raped a woman and, therefore (try to follow), he is a rapist. It’s very simple. If you kidnap and then rape someone, you are both a kidnapper and a rapist. Just like if you were to rape and then murder someone, you are a rapist and a murderer AND you should be treated and punished as such. No one’s going to say, “Oh, but he was really nice and his parents were, like, so cool and grounded and I would have never guessed he’d do that, I know like 5 other people I would have inappropriately pegged as rapey murderers but not him. So he’s, like, totally innocent. This must just be a misunderstanding.” 

Dude, Leslie, you know what else clouds boys’ and girls’ judgement? Infatuation. Maybe you should re-evaluate your feelings about your little “swim star” because no matter how caring, respectful or smart you think he is – he wasn’t caring enough to help the girl home, he wasn’t respectful enough to keep it in his pants and he wasn’t smart enough to know right from wrong. And for the record, his talent has nothing to do with knowing better but it does further my point that maybe, just maybe your judgement is a little clouded? *ahem*

I mean, “Attached is a photo of Brock I took in high school…The caption is even “d’awwww” because he always the sweetest to everyone.” Can I get a barf bag over here, please??

And one more thing Leslie, he IS NOT innocent. He was caught and it was so disturbing that one of the men who found your buddy forcing himself upon this girl and had to chase him down was crying when he talked to the cops. What is wrong with you? He was caught. He is not innocent. Are you okay?! You are doing a disservice to women everywhere, you are doing a disservice to yourself and your rights. If you had a daughter, would you still be defending this man? If this was your daughter, would you allow someone to use her level of intoxication in an attempt to exonerate the man who not only raped her but did it behind a dumpster while she was fucking unconscious? Do you even get what is going on? Do you know what year it is??

And do you still think his dad is cool and grounded (I’m sure you do)? Because I’m a mom and I actually went to a party school (and took full advantage) and I can tell you two things, cool and grounded doesn’t mean shit in the world of parenting and it’s not my college experience that has me nervous about sending my kids to school, it’s stories like this one – entitled asshole rapes an unconscious girl behind a dumpster, refuses to apologize, takes her to court to make himself feel better, his completely asinine parents and friends defend him and write juvenile letters to the court judge, rapist (clearly guilty) gets charged on three counts and yet only gets 6 months in a county jail and probation. Seriously, read that again, THAT is terrifying – THAT is wrong – THAT is completely and utterly disgusting from beginning to end. NOTHING ABOUT THAT IS OKAY.

Do you get paid to be the president of his fan club? Do you actually think this is an issue about political correctness? I’m so confused. I have so many questions. How do you think this is all okay???? 

Ugh. Some days I just hate people.

L. R. letter to judge